You would think he asked me to have sex.

TH said the other day, “It’s triple points day at Nordstrom, will you come with me and go shopping so we can pick some stuff out for me?”

To which I replied, “Ugh…sounds awful…

To which he replied, “You are the only woman I know who wouldn’t jump at the chance to go shopping for her man.”

Wait, let’s all take a moment of silence…no, a moment of laughter at “her man.”

I replied, “I don’t like shopping for myself, can you imagine how much more painful it would be to shop for someone else?”

TH, “Point taken.”

But I decided that is sad for him. Of course a trophy wife picks out her spouse’s wardrobe. But a BRW? If given the chance to pick out an outfit here or there, I should take the opportunity to have him look the way I want him to…after all, he’s my trophy, so I should dress him up in any shiny way I want right?

This post is a plea for help. How does one start to understand men’s fashion (and understand it affordably)? I could easily go into a nice men’s store and buy something right off the mannequin, but I imagine that isn’t the most efficient way to go about this since when I went to Nordstrom to check out the men-aquins, this is what I witnessed:

What the...? I can't unsee this.

What the…? How do I unsee this? That is elastic at the bottom of these pants.

This man has an eating disorder.

This statue has an eating disorder.

So I’m asking you, my dear friends, to help me learn to shop for TH. Do you have fashion blogs you recommend I read? Should I flip through mags? Do I need to know what looks good with his body type? For instance, he’s not narrow, so all those slim shirts wouldn’t fit right. And am I picking out clothes for a casual Sunday or Saturday night clubbing?

Let’s take another moment of laughter for that one.

Okay, so please comment, give me your advice on how a Blue Ribbon Wife goes about shopping for her Trophy Husband!

8 thoughts on “You would think he asked me to have sex.

  1. So I order stuff for my husband on and then return what he hates.
    I really say- go to Nordstrom with him, find a good sales person, and help direct them and go drink wine in the pub.

  2. A) NO mantyhose. But I don’t think TH would go for that, for some reason.

    B) Slim works wonders on “non-slim” bodies. But you will need to spend a years-worth of salary and come to Paris for a custom fit.

    C) If America could come within 200 pounds of those mannequins, we’d have CHANGE WE CAN BELIEVE IN.

    xxx, M. 😉

    • So I looked up Bluff Works. Loved it. But I’m confused because I treat all clothes as “ready for 5 days of wear without care in-between”…should I be doing more laundry?

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